Classroom Management: Trampling Spirits Underfoot Since 1999
This is what I hand out the first day of class. They read it aloud (ouch). About half of them start to catch on – the other half are still in first-day-of-high-school terror mode.
Expectations
My responsibilities as a teacher include:
- planning, directing, and evaluating learning opportunities
- being prepared and on time
- maintaining a safe, orderly, friendly classroom
- treating everyone in the M_____ community with respect, even those few for whom I have none at all
- listening and responding to students’ questions and concerns
- communicating clearly and courteously with students and parents
Your responsibilities as a student include:
- participating in learning to the fullest extent of your capabilities
- being prepared and on time
- maintaining a safe, orderly, friendly classroom
- treating everyone in the M_____ community with respect, including those whom you personally consider annoying, funny-looking, or too old to know anything anyway
- learning to communicate in the most effective way possible
“But Mrs. I____, how can I make those concepts realities every day?” you ask.
Glad you asked. That’s why we have…
Classroom Guidelines
Be in your seat and working when the bell rings.
- “In” means “rear making contact with the actual seat of the desk.” “In.” Not “on,” “beside,” “under,” or “somewhere within thirty yards or so.” Prepositions are important.
- The bell does not start this class; I do not start this class. This class begins when you walk into the room. Get your handouts, go to your seat, and begin the opening assignment.
- If you’re not IN YOUR SEAT when the bell rings, you’re tardy. If you try to argue about it, you’re tardy and you’re wasting valuable class time. Accept your fate with grace and dignity. Cultivate your Zen.
Have your textbook, notebook, pen, paper, and assignments in class every day.
- The textbook bit is easy. We have class sets here; keep your own at home.
- Borrowing paper or a pen from your classmates every single day is only charming and funny for a few months or so. Interrupting your teacher in order to publicly beg for a pencil is not only degrading, but bad policy.
- You have a syllabus for the entire nine-week grading period. If you lose those precious sheets of paper, go to <http://myformerclasswebpage> and print yourself another copy. Need to know what’s due? Check the syllabus. Wondering what we’re doing next week? Check the syllabus. Want to incur the loud and awful wrath of your English I teacher? Walk into class and ask, “Are we doing anything today?”
Be ready to work throughout the class period.
- “Ready to work” carries an enormous range of connotative meanings. Here are a few to keep in mind.
- AWAKE. Difficult to manage if you’ve been on the phone, the Internet, or the X-box for the past three days.
- ALERT. A hint from the far side of twenty-five: artificial stimulants, such as caffeine, wear off suddenly and without warning. Waking up in a puddle of your own saliva with an irate teacher standing over you is not as much fun as it may sound.
- ATTENTIVE. Fake it. This is a skill you’ll use the rest of your life; make it second nature now, before years of pent-up rage get in the way.
If someone else is speaking, raise your hand and wait to be called on.
- We’re a big group. This is how we avoid slipping into chaos, and stay within the bounds of controlled mayhem.
Keep your feet, hands, and objects to yourself.
- The only thing flying across this classroom should be a constantly enlightening flow of Socratic dialogue.
- Guys, remember this: not even your girlfriend REALLY likes your feet.
Respect yourself and those around you.
- Again: if you can’t do it, fake it.
The Numbers
|
Category |
Percentage |
|
Classwork/homework/prewriting |
30% |
|
Writing |
30% |
|
Quizzes |
20% |
|
Exams |
20% |
|
Flattery/expensive gifts |
Variable |
